Ah, there it is...my rage

I'm in the middle of moving, so obviously I shouldn't be playing around on my new blog. Alas, here I am. There are some interesting conversations going on at
Bitch PhD and Crazy Bitch about women, sexuality, and body acceptance. I spent my drive from residence #1 to residence #2 thinking about how women's lives are influenced by our sadistic mentality when it comes to our own bodies. How do we, as a society, and as individuals, choose who is allowed to be sexy? Sexy, IMHO, simply means that you feel entitled to your sexuality. I don't care what size you are, but if you allow yourself to feel sexually valuable and desirable, you will have a better sex life than a self-conscious size 2. How does a person break out of the ugly cycle of judging themself and other women by such ridiculous standards?

Relevant Confessions:
1. I have started (and stopped) taking Alli within the last 12 months.

That's right, Alli pills. You remember.. the ones that make you literally explode with projectile fat coming from your nether-region. I can't say this happened to me, but after a particularly graphic account from a dear friend, the Alli had to go.

2. I've crash dieted within the last 12 months.

As always, the fat comes back with a vengeance. My life loses a great deal of joy at 1200 calories a day. Fuck that. Should my morning coffee and a bagel be 50% of my food intake for the day? Fuck that.

3. I've gotten a Brazilian wax.

This alone should bar me from any woman-positive conversation for, I'd say, at least a decade.

Obviously I am not immune from the influence that movies, porn, billboards, the music industry and television have on our collective sense of self worth.

I could:
1. Get some breast implants: $15,000
2. Start tanning religiously: $20 a pop
3. Wax my entire body: $300 (guessing?)
4. Go back to 1200 cal/day: Worth about $1,000/day in terms of my general happiness

Or... I could take that $16,320, fly to Italy, squeeze my sexy ass into a bathing suit for the first time in years, find a beach (with umbrellas available to keep myself tan/cancer free), and start enjoying myself exactly as I am.

Am I being dramatic? You tell me.


Crazy... Crazy like have sex.. with a FAT GIRL?!


Whew. Much better. Right?